Originally invented to bring the magic of the high seas and the joy of almost drowning to land locked areas like Nebraska and Hawaii, as well as to teach potential Cuban refugees how to survive the short trip to Miami; wave pools are an effective way to simulate your day at the beach without worrying about getting sand in your crack or falling victim to a vicious dolphin attack. Swim enthusiasts don’t even have to worry about easing into chilly water beyond their precious privates, because these faux-ceans (that’s fake oceans) are heated; if not by a big fancy pool heater, by the constant stream of urine being emptied into the water by scores of unconcerned children and incontinent adults. Wave warriors can even take their long boards out and hang ten in the pool pipeline, provided they’re skilled at evading toddlers. The best part is, there’s no need to check the daily surf report because, get this, the waves are adjustable! So whether you’re just a beginner in the blue crush or you’re ready to tackle a tsunami, the wave pool is the trendliest place to get wet this summer.
Catch A Wave!
Hey trend surfers, it’s your friendly neighborhood trend-vel agent here to tell you about some of the hottest spots to get your leisure on this summer. A few years ago all of the richies were heading to tony locations like the French Riviera and Rockaway Beach to get their fix of that fishy sea smell, cool ocean breeze, and to reap the benefits of the epidermal enhancements that come with getting crapped on by a seagull. However, with the economy in a slight temporary downturn, celebrities like P. Diddy and Fred Schneider of the B-52’s have ditched those pricey locales in favor of the less lavish but ultimately more rewarding experience offered at water parks. So why is everybody rushing off to their local wild water wet spots instead of hitting the sandy seashores? Two trendly words….Wave Pools.
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