Get The Funk Out!
Welcome back Trendly friends. Did you miss us while we were away? We hope not too much. Who are we kidding? We hope you missed us lots because then you’ll be thrilled to know that during our vacation time, we discovered all sorts of exclusive and friendly trends that we’ll be passing along to you, our privileged readers. So are you ready to “get down” to the nitty gritty? We certainly are.
Are you longing to march to the beat of a different drummer because the current drummer you’re marching to has a difficult time performing “We Will Rock You” on Rock band’s easiest setting? Well maybe you need to change your tune entirely and get hip to the hoppest genre of music there is…Funk.
Nowadays everyone is getting into “Funk” music. Young people everywhere that smoke heaps of pot and think both Phish, Dave Matthews, and Snoop Dogg are really “solid” are being inspired to grab a bass and five or six other marginally talented bandmates to kick out the jams. In order to found a formidable modern day Funk outfit there are several crucial elements that must be combined. First, the band must consist of a majority of white bandmates save for one African- American who can really “bust out” on the trumpet or saxophone. The second crucial element for a funk band is a cool name that incorporates the word “Funk”. Some acceptable names include “Confunkshun Junction”, “Grand Funk Railroad” and “Funk Your Mother”.
If a band wants to be known as a “fusion funk” band, meaning they incorporate Jazz, Disco, Pakistani Qawwali music, and Dave Matthews into their sound, they can also employ the word “Soul” into their moniker. For example, “Soulgazm” or “The Soulfunk Fusion Express Train” are valid fusion band names. The third step to a long and fruitful career as a “Funk” band is to frequent bars that only feature other marginally talented, mostly caucasian funk bands and cater to a mostly upper-middle class collegiate fan-base who have no rhythm, but love to dance by moving their arms as though they were weaving some sort of “air craft”.
After all what’s more friendly and trendy than dancing and creating a non-existent art project with your own hands. That’s for us to know and you to find out…by listening to some Funk music…the trendliest music there is…for now.
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