Need To Hear Some Great Music, We’ve Got You Covered
Hey Trend-sistor radios, are you looking to take in the hottest ticket in town? Well, that STP reunion show isn’t for another three months and no other quality bands have made it to town around since that time Limp Bizkit stopped in on their Chocolate Starfish and The Hot Dog Flavored Water Tour. Where’s a brother to catch some trendly tunes?
Relax rock and roll children, close your eyes and open your mind, because with Cover Bands -the latest friendly trend in music- you can relive those glory days when Fred Durst and company blew through your town and left plenty of ringing eardrums with little trace of melody in their wake.
Cover bands more or less exist in every single town in the world with electricity, as a way for music fans to enjoy their favorite songs played marginally well in a live setting when they know that there’s no way in hell that their favorite band will ever stop by their craphole town. They are referred to as cover bands due to the fact their sole income comes from the money they make from the cover charge at the door of the establishment at which they are providing the rock ‘n’ roll music.
Male teenagers typically form a cover band around the time they realize that skanky women get turned on watching ugly, awkward dudes play guitar on songs that rock hard. Some of the more popular bands to cover include Metallica and Led Zeppelin, but the 90’s grunge craze gave young males the chance play somewhat more sensitive music, which in turn attracted a whole new breed of less skanky, somewhat more attractive females. These groups will frequently refer to themselves as “tribute bands” due to the misconception that if Lars Ulrich of Metallica was to ever see them play, he’d be truly honored that they took the time to learn his drum parts.
Ulrich: “The Only Thing I Hates More Than Napster is Cover Bands”
The sheer amount of cover bands is directly tied to the teen population of a particular town’s likelihood to make something of themselves. For example: Tallahassee, Florida has a much higher concentration of cover bands than, say, the affluent suburbs of Chicago, Illinois (which includes, unironically, a higher concentration of “Chicago” cover bands). However, on those nights when bands like Barracuda : A Heart Tribute Band and Thunderstruck: An AC/DC Tribute Band take the stage, they’re the biggest rock stars that town has ever seen. And really what’s trendlier than being a big fish in a small pond, dropping the rock and making a few ripples
July 2, 2008 - Posted by evankessler | Entertainment, Music | AC/DC, Barracuda, Chicago, Cover Bands, Fred Durst, hard rock, Led Zeppelin, Limp Bizkit, Metallica, Skanky chicks, Tallahassee, Thunderstruck, Tribute Bands
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