Greetings waders in the sea of the latest friendly fads. Have you been busy over the winter keeping your limbs limber by filling out forms and stretching your stamina with spreadsheets? Well, we hope you’ve been practicing your trendstroke, because without it your likely to drown in the latest friendly trend, The Office Pool.
Don’t be afraid to jump right in, the water’s fine. Despite the economic downturn nearly every place of business around the country will be installing a man made body of liquid that isn’t urine, but will certainly get mixed with a good deal of it, just in time for spring. Yes, the early days of Spring annually bring about the office festival known as, March Madness. During March Madness employers have been known to split up their employees into a field of 64 according to institutions of higher learning and stage a tournament of wills on the chlorinated court otherwise known as Swimmy Basketball.
Often times the tournament leads to management-sanctioned gambling that doesn’t involve large portions of pension funds. but more than makes up for it by inspiring plenty of trash talk to signal the renewal of some old college rivalries.
Participants receive seedings that show just how much their bosses like them, but sometimes even the most favored employees like the company brown noser fall to the janitor and a whole new office hierarchy is established. The winner is rewarded handsomely with a bonus, an extra two weeks off, and the title of National Champion.
And really what’s friendlier and trendier than carrying the label of “National Champion” if only for a year.
Every once in a while something so hop and hot comes along that it defies explanation and makes us view the world in an entirely different light when it comes to just what qualifies as both friendly and trendy. Previous powerful and puzzling examples along these lines include Crocs, Crystal Meth, and the music of Huey Lewis & The News. However, seeing as we pride ourselves on being your friendly guide to the latest trends we here at Trendliest are going to do our damnedest to explain the latest trend in portable TV technology, the resurgence of The Watchman or if we were to take the plural form, “Watchmen.”
Unless you live in a cave, the area you live in has more likely than not been inundated with confusing advertisements featuring costume clad beings hyping the release of the rehash of this electronic wonder first released by the Sony Company in 1982 in Japan. The original Japanese prototype was a man who wore 8 watches on each arm and constantly updated the time in funny voices. However, Sony soon realized there was no way to replicate this in their factory and instead focused on another definition of the word “watch” noting that people like to “watch” TV.
The new and improved Watchman made it’s debut in Europe and the United States in 1984 and the public went absolutely gaga over it. People were hungry for a televisual aid not quite the length of the average man’s penis that they could tote along with them just in case they weren’t going to make it home to catch their favorite local news telecast or reruns of “Too Close For Comfort.” Watchmen also became excellent time killers for those who were made impatient by the mere thought of waiting on lines, due to the fact that they were illiterate and would have no other means to entertain themselves other than shouting obscenities at passers by as they waited on line to dance at the Palladium.
The pocket tv phenomenon began to peter out in the 90’s well before the advances of HDTV, wireless internet, and the ability to watch all of your favorite shows on your iPod, but it’s inexplicably all the rage yet again even with the switch over to digital television. Apparently some merchandising brainiacs over at Warner Bros. thought it would be a wonderful idea to license the former fad and re-release it accompanied by a massive marketing campaign. As it turns out their hunch was right on the money. Watchmen were released this weekend to a clamoring public who ate up the seemingly obsolete innovation to the tune of $55.4 million. While there have been a few glitches in the technology such as causing users to turn blue or have their facial features shift around while gazing at such a tiny screen, the reviews have been largely positive.
We here at Trendliest didn’t exactly head down to the Circuit City and snatch one up one of these “Watchmen” to see what all of the fuss is about, but we’re going back to our childhood home this weekend to try to dig our old one up and sell it on ebay…because that’s where the real money is…and in this economy anything that can net us the real money is certainly friendly and trendy.