The Trendliest

A Friendly Guide To The Latest Trends

Hurricane You

Hey there trend-chasers! Have you been driving your beat up Dodge truck chasing the latest weather trends only to stumble on an unfriendly tornado that lacks the common decency to introduce itself before it destroys your house and parks your ATV in a tree on the other side of town? The nerve! We here at Trendliest recommend you drop that zero and get with this hero: Hurricanes! Because the latest friendly weather trend is forking over the cash so that you can name these super storms.

Naming Hurricanes is a rather recent phenomenon. After the success of the Star Registry’s efforts to charge people to name stars in the sky, The National Weather service decided that they could net a huge profit and charge a much heftier amount to attach monikers to these fierce forces of nature, based solely on the fact that there are only on average fifteen or so a season and that people would pay top dollar for the publicity it afforded the storm’s namesake. As they say, there’s no such thing as bad publicity (unless of course you happen to be a Nazi). So in 1970 the National Weather Service sold the naming rights of the first Hurricane to Yoko Ono, which has subsequently been blamed for the breakup of The Beatles, and to a lesser extent The Captain and Tennille.

Hurricane Yoko Ono In Action

Ever since it’s been totally trendly to attach your name to a violent storm in the hopes that it will increase awareness of particular projects-like forcing band breakups or telling your ex that you got engaged. Unfortunately, this is mostly a crapshoot, because not all tropical storms can be hurricanes. Such was the case with one of the biggest publicity failures that occurred when the “I Can Read Books” company ponied up big loot to name one of 1978’s storms “Amelia” in order to promote it’s children’s release Amelia Bedelia Helps Out. Well as the story goes, Tropical Storm Amelia only lasted two days and made minimal headlines. The book release was subsequently pushed back to 1979. Conversely, 2005’s Hurricane Rita was a devastating Category 5 Hurricane that made headlines nationwide, but could do little in the way of reviving Comedienne Rita Rudner’s career.

The Book At The Heart of The First Huge Hurricane Publicity Failure

There have been plenty of successful pairings such as 2004’s Hurricane Charley which caused Flowers For Algernon to re-enter the required reading list for many a junior high curriculum in the mid-Atlantic states and lest we not forget Hurricane Gloria, which dramatically drove up record sales for Laura Branigan’s 1982 single of the same name, albeit in 1985.

Whether or not you’re trying to drum up publicity for a presidential campaign or you simply want to see your name on the cover of a national newspaper that reads “(Your Name) Leaves Death and Destruction in it’s Wake”, you can rest assured that putting your name on a hurricane is the friendly and trendy way to get people talking about (your name here).

July 24, 2008 Posted by | Celebrities, Entertainment, Methods | , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment