The Trendliest

A Friendly Guide To The Latest Trends

Have A One Nightstand!

Hello my In-trend-ior decorators. Do you wake up in the middle of the night reaching for a glass of water or that book you want to read only to find it resting on your carpet below your bed? Are you looking for the perfect bedroom accessory to complement your cushy queen-sized? If these two terrible problems are a plague on your house, perhaps you should invest in the fanciest furniture find that trendsetters everywhere are investing in…nightstands.

Nightstands were originally invented by pimps as a a place for their prostitutes and gigolos to keep their condoms as they repeatedly engaged in one night stands…which is where the term “Nightstand” actually comes from. With the sexual revolution raging out of control in the 1970’s and with key parties being all the rage, nightstands moved out of brothels and into the bedrooms of promiscuous couples as a way of telling their more kinky friends that they were down for anything. As a result these “nightstands” were always them stocked with condoms, multiple copies of “I’m Okay, You’re Okay” and an autographed picture of Larry from Three’s Company.

“You Can Knock On My Door Or Reach For My Nightstand Anyday”

However, with Reagan’s election in the 1980’s sexual repression hit a new high and people began reading in bed rather than utilizing it’s springs. It was all reading glasses and Robert Ludlum novels for the next 15 years or so.

Today sexual morés have relaxed once again and as long as you don’t have a ice pick in the draw of your night stand most people would be glad to take a spin on your tempur-pedic as long as you’ve got the right stuff inside your one night stand…making them totally trendly yet again.,

June 12, 2008 Posted by | interior decoration | , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

What Are We Talking About?

Hello my gifted trend-versationalists. is talking with your friends on a day to day basis as confusing as an “H.R. Pufnstuf”- themed key party hosted by Donna Shalala where David Bowie and Grace Jones are the guests of honor? Do you have any idea what that means? If you said no, well then it’s time to get hip to the hot new trend of making bizarre cultural references in everyday conversation.

“That punt was higher than Marion Barry on a fact-finding tour of Cartagena.”

Ever since Dennis Miller‘s Lazenby-esque run as color man alongside Al Michaels and Dan Fouts on Monday Night Football had ABC execs pulling a Ronnie Reagan at the Tower Commission hearing on the Iran Contra affair when asked why they cast the former SNL Weekend update anchor in the first place, making bizarre cultural references in conversation has been as unavoidable as a drug reference in a Sid and Marty Krofft show. Just take a look around other Trendliest articles. You couldn’t crash land the Hindenburg without running into a post rife with several references that might make you wonder where your mandibula was.

Reagan: “I have no recollection of hiring Dennis Miller”

If you’re still as confused as George Takei at a transexual Star Trek convention it’s probably best to brush up on your general pop culture and historical knowledge by spending countless hours clicking on as many links as possible on Wikipedia and so that you no longer resemble Helen Keller at a screening of Deep Throat when your friends talk about feeling like LC on the latest episode of The Hills. Instead you’ll be as laid back as Alfred E. Neuman smoking a J in bed with Loretta Swit saying, “What Me Worry?” How’s that for being trendly…if you catch our drift.

May 29, 2008 Posted by | Uncategorized | , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment